How did Gerien go blind? (closed; winners posted)

[Voice Dax]

This Event stems from lotto 233. Gerien somehow believes the trivia question was missing at the time the new thread was posted. Truth is, it was there as soon as the thread was up. He thinks there was an edit to add the question. The only edit seems to be Aeneas's addition of the color purple.

Now for the event.

I want you all to give me a scenario of how Gerien seemed to temporarily lose his sight where he could not see the trivia question. Make it as long or short as you want. As funny or outrageous as you want. Post them here in this thread. Just remember board rules when writing your scenarios. Aeneas and I will judge the top two.

Top 2 winners will both win 15 turns each.

[owly]

He was in his G-strings and high-heels we all know Gerien loses blood presure with those high-heels wich caused him tempory blindness...

[Gerien]

oh dear god...

[Voice Dax]

Gerien, you are free to add your own and participate as to why you went blind. I'd love to hear.

[MicM]

Well blind grandpa told me if your hands were your best date option that they would turn hairy and you would go blind. Not much more to the story other then Gerian Is a stock holder in Nair For men and when in school he does have to sit at the front of the class!!! You put 2 and 2 together to see why the quiz question was missed!!!!

[Losmar]

Those little bugs he was complaining about earlier this year, the "invasion" of them; they ate his eyes.

[Gerien]

It was a maddening day. Protests were scheduled, wars were being fought, school assignments were due, and I had no time at all to get an outfit together. I was racing around the apartment, trying to remember whether the stilettos were for the war and the combat boots were for the protest or vice versa, when I tripped and fell, slamming the heel of my combat boot against the number pad on my keyboard, generating my lotto entry, while the stilettos fell heel up onto the desk, their shapeliness mocking me as I fell, eyes first, onto those oh-so-fetching spikes of doom, my eyes gouged out never to see a drag queen march across a subway grate in a pair again.

[Torkano]

Once upon a time, there was a man named Gerien. He masturbated all the time. He'd masturbate in the grocery store when going shopping with his mother. His mother couldn't make him stop no matter what she did. She tried switching his hand lotion with Ben-Gay, but that didn't help. She installed a masturbation motion detector that would say something to frighten him thinking he got caught but Gerien was an exhibitionist so he didn't care. He just tried performing for his audience. His mother told him he'd go blind. He never went blind so he knew his mother was fibbing. She told him he'd grow hair on his hands like wolfman. He figured she was lying so he continued to masturbate. Oh did his hands get hairy. No matter how many times he waxed and shaved it, it grew back. Eventually he learned to live with the fact that his hands would be disgustingly hairy for the rest of his life.

To the time of the blindness....

Gerien needed a fix. Internet porn just wasn't cutting it anymore. So he decided to surf for fetish sites while he was playing the Evernight lotto. One that struck his attention was Hairy Hand Porn. He clicked the link and saw the most hairiest hands he'd ever seen. Something strange happened. The hair on his hands stood up so erect and hard. His hands were excited over the hairy hands. Gerien started to worry so he thought if he covered his eyes, his hairy hands would lose their hair erection. Out of sight, out of mind. What Gerien failed to realize that his hair was so stiff it was like shoving needles in his eyes. Poor Gerien lost his sight.

[Gerien]

OMG my hands r not hairy!

(with a nod to Venus)

[Losmar]

So what you're saying Ger is that Venus's hands are hairy too...?

O_o I'm confused, and scared at the same time.

[owly]

Their two modern day Bigfoots, they should mate to keep the species going...

They should have video proof and let us see it...

Don't let the hair on your hands prevent you from hitting the record button

[Voice Dax]

Winners for this event for 15 turns each:

Gerien
Torkano

Congrats on your thought-out stories. They were entertaining and funny and outrageous. Nicely done. Collect your turns in the usual manner.

[Gerien]

rotfl thanks Dax

[Venus]

my hands are pretty!@@@@@


mean people:P

[Gerien]

my hands are pretty!@@@@@


mean people:P

Gettin' a little slow in yer old age, eh Grandpa?

[_Nagash_]

Obviously. Even for grandpa V a response time of 5 days is quite a lot.