by Torkano » Sun Nov 16, 2008 5:34 pm
Once upon a time, there was a man named Gerien. He masturbated all the time. He'd masturbate in the grocery store when going shopping with his mother. His mother couldn't make him stop no matter what she did. She tried switching his hand lotion with Ben-Gay, but that didn't help. She installed a masturbation motion detector that would say something to frighten him thinking he got caught but Gerien was an exhibitionist so he didn't care. He just tried performing for his audience. His mother told him he'd go blind. He never went blind so he knew his mother was fibbing. She told him he'd grow hair on his hands like wolfman. He figured she was lying so he continued to masturbate. Oh did his hands get hairy. No matter how many times he waxed and shaved it, it grew back. Eventually he learned to live with the fact that his hands would be disgustingly hairy for the rest of his life.
To the time of the blindness....
Gerien needed a fix. Internet porn just wasn't cutting it anymore. So he decided to surf for fetish sites while he was playing the Evernight lotto. One that struck his attention was Hairy Hand Porn. He clicked the link and saw the most hairiest hands he'd ever seen. Something strange happened. The hair on his hands stood up so erect and hard. His hands were excited over the hairy hands. Gerien started to worry so he thought if he covered his eyes, his hairy hands would lose their hair erection. Out of sight, out of mind. What Gerien failed to realize that his hair was so stiff it was like shoving needles in his eyes. Poor Gerien lost his sight.
Sartorious lives on forever in my heart and memories!
<Thantos> so there's 5 we have to break tonite
<Sexxay-Dux> well whichuns are the biggewst
<Art_is_Sexy> can we break them with fucking?